New Orleans, Louisiana

New Orleans KOA

January 1, 2022

When I think back on all our drives between campsites, this trek from Waco to New Orleans may be the worst of the worst. Not only was it a long haul, mostly along pothole ridden rural two-lane highways, but we were both rather hungover after celebrating New Year’s the night before (and drinking away our sorrows after a poor showing by the Wolverines in their first Playoff appearance).

Thankfully, we made it down to the bayou in one piece and got settled into our campground, the New Orleans KOA, before nightfall. As I’ve said before, although KOA’s tend to cost a bit more and can be hard to get into at times, you always know what you’re going to get (friendly staff, clean park, ample amenities, etc.) and this one was no exception. In actuality, there weren’t many options to choose from when it came to booking an RV site in the New Orleans area besides this KOA, located a bit out of town and right across the street from the mighty Mississippi, and another smaller, more expensive park located just off the French Quarter. In hindsight, I’m quite happy with our choice to go with the KOA. Not only did we enjoy cruising the bike path which ran along the river, which was mere yards from our campground, but after visiting the French Quarter that weekend, I’m glad we stayed as far from that place as possible.

Well, here we go, let’s trash another beloved cultural landmark!

Firstly, let me make a few excuses for the French Quarter before I hate on it too hard. In its defense, we probably went down there on one of the worst days possible, January 2nd, when it was not only chilly and overcast, but there were still piles of trash lining the streets from the previous two days’ celebrations. Still, come on New Orleans, its pathetic that you can’t get your most iconic tourist area clean of literal garbage in a 48-hour period!

The only positive memory I have from our trip down to the French Quarter was taking a few minutes to check out the St. Louis Cathedral. Although, it’s no Notre Dame or anything like that, it’s still an impressive cathedral and definitely worth exploring if you are unfortunate enough to find yourself in this God-forsaken corner of the country.

OK, now that we got the pleasantries out of the way, let’s get to hatin’! Where to start? I guess I already mentioned the trash, but that is worth a revisit. I have a feeling that Bourbon Street would have largely the same stench (stale beer, with a hint of vomit), even if the streets weren’t lined with piles of trash.

Now you might say “that’s all fine and well Clay, but I don’t have a sense of smell, so that wouldn’t bother me!” which would be a valid retort – if you were also blind, as the ugliness of the French Quarter also extended from the olfactory and into the optical. Although there were a few bright spots to be found in the form of well-kept buildings with the famous ornate patios, most of what you see in the French Quarter is grotesque – from the over-the-top drunkenness, to the tacky advertising for cheap booze, to the lost souls passed out in the street or in their shanties which lined the trash-ridden banks of the muddy Mississippi.

And, if that wasn’t enough, we had to navigate the city’s asinine vax-mandate the whole time we were down there. Shocker – a city so morally bankrupt as this one is represented by a similarly depraved political class!

I can comfortably say that New Orleans was one of our least favorite stops along our RV journey – and the more I think about it, this city probably takes the top (or bottom) spot. The best way I have of describing the feeling I get from this city is a thick layer of grime that coats everything – from the houses and the buildings (due to the near constant humidity and a lack of upkeep, I would imagine) to the culture (just check out the crime stats to get a quick understanding of this one). Let’s just say that we will not be coming back any time soon if I have any say in it!